Friday, November 1, 2013

The One Where I Was a Bridesmaid Yet Again


Published 11/1/2013


It seems that suddenly all of my friends are getting engaged or married. Literally all of them. And the ones who aren’t are those couples: the ones who disappeared from the face of the earth shortly after meeting their significant others and whose idea of fun is strictly limited to staying home and watching Netflix, going to Ikea on Saturday mornings, creating Pinterest boards for their future weddings even though they haven't been proposed to yet,  and going to brunch and/or wine tastings with other couples. Also, they like to invite me along and try to not-so-subtly hook me up with their single friends. Stop it guys, I’m on to you!

Anywho, I recently found myself as a bridesmaid in yet another wedding.  That brings the total of unusable floor-length dresses in my closet to three, with more on the horizon. Oddly enough, I was actually looking forward to this blessed event because I didn’t have to deal with a bridezilla, and because I’ve reached the point that any time I get to leave Los Angeles for any reason, it’s a bonus.

Needless to say, I got more than I bargained for because the wedding was in DC and I came pretty close to dying from exposure. It may or may not have only been in the 50s, but living in California has made me soft. Don’t judge. I quickly realized that the flimsy west coast layers that I brought would do me absolutely no good at all. There was frost on the car windows in the morning! I forgot that even existed.  Like what was even happening?!

So these nuptials marked many firsts in my bridesmaid journey- first Catholic wedding (lovely), having to walk down the aisle first (why me?), carrying a feather bouquet (yep) and putting out a literal fire (that actually happened), which made wearing shoes that were two sizes too big in the ceremony seem trivial in comparison. Yes, there were mishaps my friends, but despite the fashion emergencies, fire hazards and frostbite, I learned that a Mardi Gras themed wedding has a lot of perks. My only regret is that I didn’t have enough time to sightsee/ walk around the capital pretending to be Olivia Pope. Maybe next time.

DAILY SCORECARD:

Venue:  5
Alcohol Situation: 3
Bouquets Caught: 0 (Bitches be crazy when bouquets are on the line!)
Personal Victory/Dignity Retained: 5 (No drunken bridesmaid episodes for this girl.)
Atmosphere: #winning (but also cold as hell)

1 comment:

  1. Boo hoo. Its supposed to snow here tomorrow. And yes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYHfnpzG2RQ Bitches be Crazay (not entirely related), but still relevant.

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